Emotions

I usually don't "vent" on a blog but here goes.....I hurt emotionally today. I have cried for most of the day. I absolutely hate to admit this as I am not much of a crier. I am the touch one of the family. Greg cries more than I do. Shhh... don't tell him I said that.

Why am I this way you ask? I had a hurtful conversation with a family member that I adore and love dearly this morning. I feel like I am being left out to dry by this person. Rejection, that describes the conversation. It took until tonight that I realized that this is just a test of my faith. My Heavenly Father, the one who will never ever turn His back on me was rejected. He was made fun of. He was alone. Through my pain today, He reigns. Nothing I will ever go through on this earth will never compare to what He went through. That is today's lesson.

That you my Father, my Redeemer, for loving me, for choosing me when my earthly family does not. I am reminded of this song..yes I am going to share the words which I know is illegal but I am not selling it!!!! This is just a simple reminder for me today as tears stream down my face;

Sometimes Your calling, comes in dream
Sometimes in comes in the Spirit's breeze
You reach for the deepest hope in me
And call out for the things of eternity
But I'm a man (woman), of dust and stains,
You move in me, so I can say
Here I am, Lord send me
All of my life,
I make an offering,
Here I am, Lord send me
Somehow my story is a part of Your plan, Here I am
When setbacks and failures, and upset plans
Test my faith and leave me with empty hands
Are You not the closest when it's hardest to stand
I know that You will finish what You began
And these broken parts
You will redeem Become the song that I can sing
Overwhelmed by the thought of my weakness
And the fear that I'll fail You in the end
In this mess, I'm just one of the pieces,
I can't put this together but You can
Here I am, all my life an offering to You,
to You Somehow my story is a part of Your plan
Here I am